Growing Up Made Me Ashamed to Relax

We’ve got responsibilities.  We’ve got bills.  We’ve got goals.  We’re adults now.  But really, we’re also just horrible at pausing and seizing the day. 

For most of us there is always a to-do list.  We are always thinking about what’s next.

But some times life hands you a 90 degree day in January and you just can’t ignore that kind of gift.

Except we do.  All the time.  Because, life.

We’ve got responsibilities.  We’ve got bills.  We’ve got goals.  We’re adults now.  But really, we’re also just horrible at pausing and seizing the day.  I’m preaching to myself here, but honestly, probably you as well.  

Toward the end of both of my pregnancies I have been reminded of this.  I have a to-do list and I work feverishly to complete it because I know there is a huge productivity wasteland coming at me in the near future.  And then all the boxes get checked.

But each time I’ve reached forty weeks pregnant, neither of my babies have arrived.  So I have some unaccounted for time.  I am forced to remember what I used to do for pure pleasure before I was a grown-up.  Ummmmm?!  What?!  But then it starts to slowly come back to me…hang out with friends…do something creative, like drawing a picture…go to the beach!

Lifes a beach bag
This Beach Bag was given to me on the last day of my position at a corporate marketing company.  I think they assumed I would use my new “free time” at the beach.  Today was the first time it’s been used.

So that’s kind of what I’ve been up to this last week.

The productive adult in me is embarrassed to admit it.  I feel the need to mention the admirable, grown-up things I’ve done this week (attend a children’s book writing class, write query letters to agents, track stats and book sales) so you don’t think less of me.  But honestly, doing things just for fun has been super strange, and super fulfilling.  

I’ve gone to a chick flick at the theater (who knew movies were only $6 if you go at 11 am?!), I’ve done some pencil drawings in my sketch book, and another preggo mama and I spent three hours at a cozy little spot in Laguna Beach chatting with the sand between our toes on a  beautiful 90 degree day in January.

Mermaid chubby Baby twins

It’s like my Baby Girl is already forcing me to mentally slow down and be present and grateful for the moment in front of me, a skill that surely does not come naturally as an adult.

Watch out world, she already wants to be in charge.

pregnant laguna beach 1 (1)
Um, Do I look fat in this? 😉  41 wks. baked.

 

 

 

 

Author: J.K. Coy

Orange County Mom. Wife. Author. I like being active almost as much as I love dark chocolate, so that works out well most days.

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